Pat Taub
Guest Post by Stephanie Raffelock
We arrive at the doorstep of older age without a plan. Often retirement isn’t what it’s cracked up to be. We often find our sense of self, tangled up with what “we used to do” instead of “who we are now.”
THE PURPOSEFUL LIFE
Life comes down to this at any age: we are meaning-seeking creatures, sustained by a sense of purpose rather than material goods. While youth gave us an idealistic vision, our thirties and forties, shifted the focus to long-term partnerships, children and work.
The idea that when you’re sixty, you’re supposed to stick a fork in it and be done, is just not true. Each phase of life requires a vision.
Meditating on a vision for the Third Chapter
RECLAMATION
When I finished my education, I wanted to be a writer. But life intervened, with a marriage, a business, and a mortgage to pay. My writing life was relegated to the back burner.
It wasn’t until I was sixty-two, that I picked up my pen again, reclaiming a piece of myself that I thought was broken. Many women my age are returning to once closely held aspirations, as I did. You’re never too old to dream.
WHAT WILL YOU DO WITH YOUR TIME
The mind and the heart hold the same enthusiasm of intention as it did decades ago, but the energy to see projects through is a more delicate balance.
It’s time to learn to say yes to less, and choose only those endeavors that feel nurturing to our hearts.
Saying “Yes” to what nurtures us, like the company of good friends.
CONTINUING EDUCATION
Remember all the things that you said you’d like to learn? Now, you can go to school and study anything you want. This too is a kind of reclamation. This too is vision.
Immersing yourself in the study of something just because you love the subject keeps us curious and open about life, and fluid in our minds and hearts.
The joy of learning can enrich the Third Chapter
MAKING THINGS
I’ve met a lot of creative women who are up to their elbows in art or crafts. Until my mom was 89 years old, she knitted colorful hats that she gave away to a foster care organization. The process of creating and generosity was a life-affirming experience for her. Making things is a vision of satisfaction. Do what you love.
REFLECTIVE JOURNALING
Writing can be a doorway into the examined life; a way to express the breadth of emotion; a soul bath that dries the tears of loss and inspires the joy of living fully.
Journaling is not limited to words on a page. Journals can include collage, photographs, and keepsakes. They are mirrors reflecting the long life you’ve lived, which informs who you’ve been and who you are still becoming.
Reflective journaling can enlighten a new path
ELDER, MENTOR, WISE WOMAN
Being a wise elder is a big part of the vision I have for my sixties. I aspire to truth and kindness. I strive to be an activist for what I know is right, even if I am a lone and dissenting voice. I find ways to share my life with young and old alike, inspired by the struggle that we all share, that of being a the best person we can be.
The writer, Ursula LeGuin offering empowering advice befitting a mentor
Liberation can find us when the trappings and prowess of youth have waned. The choice is clear: count and resent the losses of aging, OR create a vision that defines purpose, passion and direction. We will keep changing in our lives right up to the end and it’s up to us to claim purpose at each phase.
Imagining a new vision for life in your older years is an acknowledgement that you are entering a new frontier.
What vision do you hold for your silver years?
Stephanie Raffelock is a graduate of Naropa University’s program in Creative Writing and Poetics. She interned at The Boulder Daily Cameraand has penned articles for numerous publications, including The Aspen Times, Quilters Magazine, Care2.com, Nexus Magazine, Omaha Lifestyles, and The Rogue Valley Messenger. She currently writes a monthly column for SixtyandMe.com.
Reach out to her at www.stephanieraffelock.com, Facebook: @StephanieRaffelockTweet: @Sraffelock
