Pat Taub
GUEST POST by JANE SESKIN
For more than forty years I’ve made poems. They’ve seen me through illness, fear, anger and grief-work. They’ve filled me with delight, happiness, joy and laughter. Poetry has been a way to observe and take pictures without a camera. Making poems helps me witness and notate the days. The poems have been comfort food during rough times, a way to process my emotional shadows and a cheerleader for my spirit.
Jane Seskin’s 40 years of writing poems have proved invaluable in charting her life.
Someone asked the other day how I write a poem. This is what happens: I see something that triggers a memory or thought, get an idea, an image, a sentence fragment, a word that pops into my head and I write it down in a little green notebook.
I might then think about it during the day, add to it, try to understand what I was trying to express, type it up, print it out, put it in a folder, let it sleep. Come back to it. Maybe that day, maybe a week later. Maybe longer. Look at it. Play with the words, the lines, say them out loud. Walk around the living room. Edit. Put the poem back in the folder. Marinate some more. Rewrite. And when I’m really stuck putting it together, I go for a walk and trust the words to find me.
A poet looking for inspiration
Older, Wiser, Shorter: An Emotional Road Trip to Membership in the Senior Class, is my thirteenth book. It took four years to come together as a collection of 63 intimate poems that tell the story of my struggle to accommodate, adjust and accept my aging self. It would be great if getting older came with an instruction guide. And yes, there is a growing body of research and numerous studies available, but I wanted to remember what the changes (physical and emotional) felt like to me.
As a psychotherapist I’ve encouraged women clients to find connection and community with other women. I truly believe we learn to be women by spending time with others, similar and different from ourselves. I propose life with cohorts younger and older.
Listen to their stories. Watch and learn how they navigate issues of assertion, anger, body image, sexuality, self-worth, financial independence, empowerment and legacy. The poems in my book strive for these moments of conversation. This is my “Personal.” I imagine there are pieces here that may also belong to you.
The author cites women’s communities as an invaluable resource for women of all ages
I love the “Vows” in the book. They are commitments I make to myself. I might print one out and put it in my pocket as a reminder. From the book:
VOW
I WILL
not miss
seeing something,
doing something,
going somewhere –
because I have to
do it
alone.
An older woman enjoying her own company
There was a period of time when words would vanish and I needed to trust and accept in the process of finding them again.
MEMORY AT SIXTY-FIVE
I’m having a
conversation with
someone when my
brain goes AWOL
and a name or word –
think Johnny Mathis,
labyrinth, waxy begonia,
bank password, becomes
deeply submerged
and can’t be retrieved
until three to five hours
later, when what was
missing, suddenly pops
up through the
seaweed, into another
time and space.
A woman experiencing an age-related memory lapse
This last poem speaks to the ambivalence of wanting/having a relationship.
ARRANGEMENT
Most of the time
I’m in love
with my single life
which is not to say
I don’t have room
to be in love
with a good man,
but this time around
I think I’d just like
custody,
say Wednesday
evenings
and every other
weekend.
