If you live alone, if your family is scattered far and wide, if you recently lost a partner or spouse, if you can’t afford the plane...
Home Alone
If you live alone, if your family is scattered far and wide, if you recently lost a partner or spouse, if you can’t afford the plane fare to visit family or to enjoy a holiday escape, you may be feeling miserable and lonely, making [...]
Pat Taub
Mothers and Daughters10
Thank You’s I Never Got to Deliver
What if you had a chance to pose lingering questions to important people in your life who are now deceased? Poet Victoria Chang did this very thing, writing letters to her deceased parents, which she compiled into the book, “Dear Memory.” Chang, in trying to come to terms with her sketchy knowledge of her parents’ upbringing [...]
Pat Taub
What I Hold
This past weekend I hunkered down with treasured artist Maira Kalman’s latest book, Women Holding Things, a collection of playful drawings of women holding things accompanied by Kalman’s witty commentary. This delightful book prompted me to make a list of some of the things I hold along with those that will free me up if I stop holding [...]
Pat Taub
Don’t Dismiss the Foremothers in Your Family
I have friends who insist the women in their families didn’t provide examples of independence and/or positive aging. This observation can be skewed by the fact that our mothers and grandmothers didn’t live in our enlightened era where women are consciously aging with an awareness of ageism and sexism, and where the anti-aging industry [...]
Pat Taub
“Barbie” Meets Two Old Women
GUEST POST by JANET WEIL “Barbie” is the Talk of Summer 2023. I saw this hyped movie as a break from move-in housework, as I’ve just transitioned to the Barbie heartland of Southern California. Some laughs and a mild satire of the iconic doll were all I expected. Instead, my mind was blown by this ambitious dive into the representation [...]
Pat Taub
Play Ball!
GUEST POST By BARBARA BENGELS I have to make sure that the Mets aren’t playing whenever I call my dear friend Anna Lea. She’s 92 and a late comer to baseball, has only been obsessed for the past thirty years. Some of my college students are equally engrossed, even asking if they could miss an occasional class which “interfered” with [...]
Pat Taub
Gratitude To the Women Who Shaped My Life
As we move into Women’s History Month, the tendency is to celebrate famous women in the arts and politics, giving short strife to those less famous women who made an indelible impression on our lives. For Women’s History Month, I’m honoring relatives, neighbors, schoolteachers, and others who took me under their wing to model courage, [...]
Pat Taub
Shedding Anger
One of the most valuable lessons aging has bestowed on me is the importance of shedding anger. The less anger I hold, the more inner peace I possess. I’ve learned to release a lot of my anger by developing new narratives to replace those that made my blood boil. My new story path originated through writing about my mother. When I submitted [...]
Pat Taub
Healing A Mother Wound
Mother’s Day is right around the corner, and while it’s a joyful time to honor mothers, it can also be an unsettling occasion for those adult daughters with a pronounced mother wound. The holiday can reawaken a daughter’s memories of the maternal hurt she experienced growing up and which continues to affect her primary relationships. [...]
Pat Taub
Women’s Friendships As A Lifeline
A friend once said, “If grown women had pajama parties, they wouldn’t need therapists.” She was referring to the close connections among girls that often get lost when women mature, becoming preoccupied with family and careers. Feminist psychology contends that because women are affiliative by nature they frequently find their voice [...]
Pat Taub
Listening to Nurses
With COVID-19 propelling nurses into the headlines, I wanted to understand what it means to be a nurse. I contacted the National Nurses Union, who put me in touch with two Maine nurses, Cokie Giles, 64, and her daughter Jessie Lambert, 38. Last week we talked via Zoom. As members of the union, Cokie and Jessie are protected from being [...]
Pat Taub