Living with Uncertainty

“We’re living with uncertainty layered on top of uncertainty.”–NPR host, Meghna       Chakrabarti

“I’m filled with anxiety like I’ve never experienced before.”–A close friend

“Nothing feels normal anymore.”–A comment I overheard waiting for my take-out coffee

The collective uncertainty brought on by Covid took a bizarre turn this past weekend with the news that Trump tested positive for the virus as did countless others in his circle, who similarly ignored the CDC recommendations to wear masks and practice social distancing. The September 26th Rose Garden reception for Amy Coney Barrett, Trump’s candidate to replace Ruth Bader Ginsburg on the Supreme Court, turned into a super spreader event sparked by the defiant Washington elite in attendance.

Among the 150 guests at the Rose Garden reception for Barrett. Guests were squeezed together with barely any masks. Later they mingled, with many guests exchanging hugs.

For those Americans not in denial about Covid, which is most of us, it’s becoming increasingly difficult to cope with the uncertainty of our new world order where truth is at a premium.  We hear one story from the White House and a contradictory one from the scientific community.   The media doesn’t help with its scare headlines. the one below is from the New York Post, 9/28/20.

How can we best address our Covid-generated fears? The popular Buddhist writer, Pema Chodron, recommends that we replace the story we tell ourselves with a new narrative. We are called to discard the Chicken Little story of  “The sky is falling” with a story centered on loving-compassion towards one’s self and others.

That sounded pretty idealistic, but I kept reading. Chodron got my attention with the question, “Do I prefer to grow up and relate to life directly, or do I choose to live and die in fear?”  To stop living in fear Chodron recommends that we craft a new story where we face our fears, rather than trying to run from them.

Developing a new story is enhanced by a mediation practice. If you’re skeptical of meditation, research shows that meditation can lower your anxiety and open up new possibilities. If you’re a newbie, start with 10-15 minute meditations.  I’m partial to a prayer-meditation where I ask for help in replacing my looming uncertainty with a calmer story that lowers my blood pressure.

Quiet, reflective time has helped me banish those “woe is me” thoughts of not being able to see family hundreds of miles away, or agonizing over not knowing when I can eat indoors in my favorite restaurant, or fly on an airplane.  (After all, these are first-world complaints.)

Instead of ruminating over not knowing when my life will return to normal, meditation is opening me up to a story where I envision my alone time filled with exciting new writing projects and developing my dreams of holding a women’s spiritual retreat post-lockdown.

Keeping a journal can help unlock a creative path to pursue during the lockdown.

According to Chodron, a compassionate practice involves more than being gentle with myself. It includes extending compassion to those with whom I’m at odds.  Developing compassion towards Trump and his followers means accepting them for who they are and moving on where I adopt a positive focus, like working for social justice. In my own small way, I can try to be a force for loving-kindness.

Young protesters advocating compassion, key to overcoming our differences

Developing a new story takes time, which means despair will creep in when least expected.  When this happens, I’m reminding myself to hit the reset button for the hope button, following the lead of another esteemed Buddhist teacher, Joanna Macy, who writes about turning fear into hope through a communal response:

By allowing ourselves to feel our pain for the world, we open ourselves up to the web of life, and we realize that we’re not alone.  I think it’s a cardinal mistake to try to act alone.   .  . .  The response that is appropriate . . .is to grow a sense of solidarity with others and to elaborate a whole new sense of what our resources are and what our power is.”