While I’m an elder, I hadn’t given a lot of thought to dying, that is until my brother, who’s 20 months younger, announced in...
Thinking About Death
While I’m an elder, I hadn’t given a lot of thought to dying, that is until my brother, who’s 20 months younger, announced in a recent late-night phone call that he had been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. (To preserve my brother’s [...]
Pat Taub
Grandmothering10
Don’t Dismiss the Foremothers in Your Family
I have friends who insist the women in their families didn’t provide examples of independence and/or positive aging. This observation can be skewed by the fact that our mothers and grandmothers didn’t live in our enlightened era where women are consciously aging with an awareness of ageism and sexism, and where the anti-aging industry [...]
Pat Taub
My Family Drama
Ram Dass: “If you think you’re enlightened, go spend a week with your family.” This quote came back to haunt me after spending Memorial Day weekend with my family. As my plane descended into Chicago’s O’Hare airport, I was filled with anticipation for my granddaughter’s high school graduation and for our first family reunion after [...]
Pat Taub
My Unconventional Valentine’s Rituals
Several years ago, when I grew weary of my unpartnered Valentine’s Days limited to red construction paper hearts from my grandchildren or Internet offers of bargain chocolates, I decided to make a ritual of doing something special for myself on Valentine’s Day, so I wouldn’t feel left out. That first year I indulged in a longtime desire [...]
Pat Taub
Waking Up to Climate Change
I have to make a confession: I have been a bad climate citizen. While I have been moved to the core by this summer’s record smashing heat, wildfires and floods, in response, I have done little more than wring my hands and exchange feelings of despair with friends. This weekend I read the book, All We Can Save, which hit me like a ton of [...]
Pat Taub
A Visit from the Grands, Writing My Family History, 2 Films & More!
Grands Visit Last week, my two grands, Jane, 17 and her brother Max, almost 16, flew from Chicago to Portland to visit me. It was our first time together since Christmas, 2019. Since then Max has grown to 6 feet. Jane’s funky-thrift shop look is now off the charts. We had fun even though the cold and rain pre-empted beach time. [...]
Pat Taub
What I Miss About Shopping
Months of COVID isolation without the option to shop left me examining my shopping habits. Over time it became clear that my shopping was spurred on by a consumer driven reflex, and not because I needed any more clothes. I realized what I miss more than purchasing a cheap Chanel knock-off are my shopping companions. Shopping for me, like for [...]
Pat Taub
Why Do Mothers-in-Law Have a Negative Image?
When my oldest son became engaged, a luncheon was arranged to introduce me to his finance’s family. The scrutiny I received from my future daughter-in-law’s sisters made me feel like they were from the CIA. I experienced the uncomfortable sensation that I was being sized-up to determine the extent to which I’d be a problematic mother-in-law. [...]
Pat Taub
Banishing the “I’m Not Being Productive” Guilt
“I feel guilty because I have all this time at home and I’m not being productive.” This is a common response I’ve been hearing from friends and seeing on Facebook postings. Enough! Let’s put an end to these harsh self-judgments. The “productive” path right now is to give yourself time to adjust to the coronavirus’ mandated [...]
Pat Taub
#Not Dying4Wall Street, A Surprise, A Good Read & More!
#NotDying4WallStreet This is a new popular hash tag, which sprung up after Trump suggested that the country’s social isolation end by Easter, noting that if some people (us older adults) have to die, it may be worth it to get the economy rolling again. Jeffrey St. Clair, writing in Counterpunch, referred to Trump’s sacrificial plan as [...]
Pat Taub
An LA Birthday, Lisa Savage’s Run, A Good Read & More!
My Birthday in LA In what has become a birthday tradition, last weekend I traveled to LA to spend my birthday weekend with my youngest son, Jonathan, who lives in Santa Monica. We ate at wonderful ethnic restaurants, saw a bad play, an iffy film, but a wonderful LA Philharmonic concert at the Disney Center, led by the Phil’s star conductor, [...]
Pat Taub