At lightning speed, Trump is chucking the constitution and flaunting cruel racist policies, throwing many Americans into despair. Climbing...
Aging Thoughtfully10
Healing the Mother Wound
Mother’s Day can be an unsettling occasion for those adult daughters with a pronounced mother wound. A celebration of mothers can reawaken a daughter’s memories of the maternal hurt she experienced growing up and which continues to affect her primary relationships. The mother wound can be traced to a woman’s proclivity to rejection, [...]
Pat Taub
When Loss Brings Up More Than I Bargained For
This past weekend I attended the memorial service for Connie Chandler Ward, one of the founders of Greenfire, a women’s spiritual retreat center in Tenants Harbor, Maine. Connie, a former Wellesley chaplain had been a spiritual mentor to me and many others. As I rushed out the door I stuffed a packet of travel-sized Kleenex in my purse, [...]
Pat Taub
Is the Wellness Industry Stressing-Out Older Americans?
It seems like a paradox to accuse the wellness industry of adding stress to the lives of older Americans, yet this is a central thesis in Barbara Ehrenreich’s new book, Natural Causes: An Epidemic of Wellness, The Uncertainty of Dying and Killing Ourselves to Live Longer. Ehrenreich maintains that many older Americans are stressed-out [...]
Pat Taub
Growing Old Without a Partner
I’m all for love and romance but when our love options run out as we age, when dating is more frustrating than satisfying, wouldn’t we be happier if we accepted that love is no longer in the cards, seeking companionship among friends and family? I mentioned this to a friend who looked aghast as if I were delivering a death sentence! [...]
Pat Taub
Learning to Be Old
What if the US had an official agency called “Learning to be Old”? Here’s how I imagine it: older women and men are scheduled for aging interviews where their aging progress is assessed followed by recommendations for a meaningful old age. When I show up for my interview I’m escorted to the women’s section and led [...]
Pat Taub
“Happiness is a Choice You Make:” A Book Review
In his best-selling book, “Happiness is a Choice You Make,” the author, John Leland makes the intriguing claim, “If you want to be happy, think like an old person.” Curious about Leland’s thesis, I scooped up his book, eager for tips on being happy in my advanced years and wanting to escape the lot of the old people in my family [...]
Pat Taub
Banishing Regrets!
All things considered I’m managing my old age fairly well. I can check off most of the boxes for health, close friendships, meaningful work, etc., but when it comes to handling my regrets, I’m frequently stalled. I’m haunted over screaming matches with my teenage sons, impatience with my mother when she was dying, love affairs I [...]
Pat Taub
A Cure for Loneliness: Building Community
Guest Blog by Joie Grandbois At the age of 39 I made the decision to return to school to pursue my bachelor’s degree. At that time, I had a vibrant circle of friends with a very active social life. My weekends were spent dancing, brunching with friends, and making music with fellow artists. I was very active in my spiritual community, hosting [...]
Pat Taub
“No Time to Spare:” A Book Review
With my birthdays piling up I ordered Ursula LeGuin’s* new collection of essays, No Time to Spare, seeking enlightenment for my own aging journey. The book’s title was inspired by a Radcliffe alumni survey sent to LeGuin, class of 1951. She was dumbfounded by the question that asked how she spent her spare time. Her response: “What is [...]
Pat Taub
New Year’s Resolutions for Soulful Living
Many of us toasted 2018 with resolutions for improving our everyday lives, focusing on losing weight, eating healthier, and strengthening our close relationships. But what if we departed from the standard pledges and instead made New Year’s resolutions that cater to the soul? Think about it, if we all made just one soulful promise and kept [...]
Pat Taub