GUEST POST by MICHAEL STEINMAN Imagine you’ve had a visible medical scare: a dermatologist has carved a chunk out of your forehead,...
Say These Five Words
GUEST POST by MICHAEL STEINMAN Imagine you’ve had a visible medical scare: a dermatologist has carved a chunk out of your forehead, or perhaps you are using crutches. But you have a lunch date with your best friend, and as [...]
Pat Taub
Positive Self-Image10
Aging Like A Wise Woman
Over coffee, a friend suggested that I write a blog offering guidelines for meaningful aging. This week I’m taking her suggestion to heart. Here’s what I came up with: Honor Your Failures Reframe your “failures” as risks you took where you stuck your neck out. Examine them for the lessons they presented and move on where you promise [...]
Pat Taub
COME TO THE CABARET
GUEST POST by MICHAEL STEINMAN Every day, I encounter deaths and illnesses: people I know and admire. Someone is no longer there. My first response is a horrified helplessness, emotional paralysis. But I cannot live in fear and premature mourning. Because I am not morose by nature, what bloomed in my mind today was whimsical and introspective, [...]
Pat Taub
How Did You Get to Where You Are?
GUEST POST by SHIRLEY DELONG Remember when the only way to figure out how to get to a place you’d never been before was to use a paper map? If you were like me, you’d write down all the road names in order, each left or right turn you had to make, approximate mileage and some landmarks to help you know you were on the right track. Or depending [...]
Pat Taub
“I Hate Being Old!”
Currently I’m teaching the course, “Women and Aging” at Portland, Maine’s senior college. The first day, as we went around the room introducing ourselves, one woman defiantly exclaimed, “I hate being old. I hate my lined face. I hate not being able to move as well as I once did. I hate being too old to date because men my age [...]
Pat Taub
Autumn Is My New Year
While New Year’s Eve is the traditional time for making resolutions, autumn is my new year. Autumn’s entry into the darkness of winter beckons me to soul-search and reset my compass for the coming year. This call is reinforced by having a fall birthday–one I proudly share with Jimmy Carter. This year I decided to do more than [...]
Pat Taub
Letting Go of Regrets
All things considered I’m managing my old age fairly well. I can check off most of the boxes for health, family, etc., but when it comes to handling my regrets, I’m often stalled. To this day I’m haunted over screaming matches with my teenage sons, impatience with my mother when she was dying, love affairs I allowed to go on way [...]
Pat Taub
Finding Freedom
GUEST POST BY MARY LOU MACKIN Twenty-two years ago, I stood before a judge in a courtroom full of strangers trembling and bewildered, to petition for a restraining order from my abusive husband. I was the mother of a one-year old son, and I was terrified for his future more than my own. I felt the sudden presence of someone by my side, [...]
Pat Taub
Death Journaling
GUEST POST by FRANCESCA LYNN ARNOLDY* My Death Journal is a gift for my beloveds that I have been lovingly creating for many years. It’s meant for my end of life—whenever that occurs. My family members know of its purpose and where it lives. My Death Journal contains mementos, messages, song lyrics, poetry, quotes, wishes for care if and [...]
Pat Taub
Recognize Self-Defeating Thinking
Aging can be so challenging for the older woman that it’s a wonder any of us enjoy a happy old age, but it’s within reach once we learn to recognize thinking patterns that box us in. It’s natural to indulge in thinking about good times in the past. Romancing the past can be problematic when it becomes obsessive and obscures the reality [...]
Pat Taub
Aging and Raging
GUEST POST by JANET WEIL “Here’s the check, sweetheart.” The handsome young waiter laid the little tray on the table. Seating me at a booth, he had started with, “I guess it’s just the two of us.” I felt a vague annoyance. Now, after his calling me “sweetie” twice before, annoyance was turning to anger, a familiar emotion [...]
Pat Taub